Lesson 2: How to Treat Women

Son(s),

Basically, don't be a poopsausage.

The end.

Not enough of explanation? Ok fine.

God created women separately than men. They were created second, from a part of Adam. The Bible says that Eve was the first deceived, and then she deceived Adam. Some passages say that women are to submit to their husbands, go live in tents when they are on their period, wear hats in church, and they shouldn't teach men.

So what does all this mean for you? Probably not much. Many of the passages in the Bible don't really inform our behavior on how men should treat women. They tell you how to treat your wife, at least they kinda do, but really since women are really just other people, then I would say go look at the verses in the Bible that talk about how to treat other people.

Because here is really the thing: Women are equal to men. Men are neither greater or lesser than women. We were created to neither rule nor be ruled by women. God loves us the same. Equally. That's it.

There are two lies that will be told to you about how to treat women and they are both equally dangerous.

The first is that women are objects. The world tells you this lie by telling both men and women that their women's looks are the most important thing about themselves. That means that how much they weigh, how big their boobs are, how much skin they show, what type of clothes they wear, what color their hair is all become their most pressing concerns. Their worth then is not found in Jesus, but rather their appearance. How do they compare with other girls and how many boys will look at them.

And men support this. It makes us feel good, and it teaches us that since the most important thing about women is their appearance then the hottest girl is the most important. This is not how we treat people.

People are important because they are people. Not because of something about them, much less something that is largely out of their control.

This lie perpetuates in the church a little differently. Many times they are told that they are objects that belong to their fathers or husbands. They are not independent and are equally free to be who they were created to be. Appearance is also focused on, and while modesty is something important for both men and women, remember something or someone outside yourself cannot cause you to sin. Only you can do that. Many women in the church feel as if their bodies are shameful because men may lust after them. Let me tell you firmly that you are the only one to be blamed for your lust. Your sin is yours.

The second lie that is told about women is that they are subordinate to us men.

It is easy to see this in the church. Submission is emphasized and equality is downplayed. Men are elevated over women both subtlety and overtly.

The media is a big culprit that relays to girls that they are supposed to be weaker, dumber and quieter than boys. Adventure is for men, supporting is for women.

So how do you treat women?

Respect. Treat women as equal partners in grace and dignity. For we are all equally fallen. We are also individuals. Women are just as dynamic as men, so to tell you there is one right way to treat women belittles how complex all people are. So if you meet a girl that likes when you open the door for her, then do it. If a girl tells you about a problem, listen to her, don't try to fix it, but rather believe that she is capable of fixing her own problems. Don't only compliment girls about their looks. Speak to them in love, but build them up as a sister. Point out how they encourage you, how they help you be a better person, why you respect them as a person.

Listen to their advice, model how they share their feelings. Don't value a girl because of only how she looks. Never, ever use your words or your hands to intentionally harm them. That goes for everyone.

And remember, don't be a poopsausage.

Love,

Dad